Don't push me, I ain't been saved but for a minute...

Well, I've been saved much longer than a minute but I made the committment to live right for real for real about 10 years ago. And yes, it is a challenge. I have always been a shoot it straight, keep it real type of person and unfortunately for me that may involve some cussing. I'm not a sailor or anything like that, but some situations warrant a good stern look you in the face cussing out. I like to hang out with my friends in social settings.... like a club and if the DJ plays my song I will drop it like its hot. I have a child and I wasn't married to his dad. I'm also a fan of alcohol, mainly wine and anything with vodka in it; although I am proud to say that I've been on a drinking fast for about 6 months give or take a recent fall off the wagon. My point is I'm not God or Jesus, I'm Nefertari.

God knew that when he made me that I wasn't going to be perfect so he made some provisions for people like myself. By no means is that permission to dine at the all you can sin buffet, but its definitely not a pass to judge. I'm just talking about me right now, but I'm sure if this were not a soliloquy your story wouldn't be much different from mine. My guess is you're not perfect either. If God wanted perfection he would have created such, thus eliminating the need to send his Son. Even Jesus was tested, in the garden of Gesthamane. He could have chose not to allow himself to be nailed to the cross, but instead in his prayer to his Father he simply said, "Thy will be done." And as a result we all have a chance to go to Heaven.

My point... God wants to use you. Yes, you with all of your imperfections, your drama and your mess. In fact that's exactly the type of person he's looking to have join his team. People with real experiences that have been changed from the inside. Folks that can say, "Even me. He used even me!"

You see, they call it a Christian walk for a reason. It's a journey not a destination. One where you evolve as a person and as a Christian. You start school today but you don't get a degree tomorrow. As in life, God doesn't expect you to become perfect overnight but he definitely expects growth. That is why who I am today is not who I once was and not who I hope to become.