Fresh from the dating adventures of JustNef we have a 1st.
Not since high school has someone taken me on a date to McDonald's. While normally this would warrant automatic dismissal from tryouts I must say that this man has cemented a 2nd date from me in the very near future.
I'm all over this trying something new thing and this is exactly how I ended up eating a kids meal at McD's for dinner on Saturday. When he asked if we could meet up sometime over the past weekend my knee jerk response was I have my son and generally need advanced notice to make accomdations for him but straight from a Tyler Perry movie dude was like, "Well I have my girls this weekend, so why don't we meet at the park and we can bring the kids?" How could I say no to that? The boy enjoyed the park, and the meet up was so unassuming that none of the kids really noticed. At the end of the play date his girls stated that they were hungry and asked their dad if he would take them to McDonald's. He said sure but in a twist of fate they asked if they could invite their new friend (my son)...lol How cute! It was definitely a good time for the great taste of McDonald's.
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Saturday, October 16, 2010
It was over before it started...
Welp, Jamaica was cut from the roster. I love early cuts. No one is attached, so walking away isn't personal.
So what lead to Jamaica's downfall? Well we were supposed to meet up for a date, one in which we had talked to each other about just an hour and a half prior to the scheduled meet time of 7:30pm. Well 7:30 came, no Jamaica. 8:00 came, no Jamaica, no phone call or text. 8:30 I called and left a voicemail. 8:45 I sent a text. 9pm he was unofficially released, barring extenuating circumstances such as death, arrest or hospitalization. However those circumstances had an expiration time of midnight. When I finally heard back from him, it around 1pm the next day and it was by text, which read, "I am so sorry. I was speelling." Ok, first of all what the hell is speelling? And secondly, was the best excuse he could come up with 18 hours later? Honestly he could have kept that message because I don't communicate after a cut but I do enjoy a good lie every now and then. He didn't even try to envoke his imagination...
Here is an important take away from Jamaica's slip. My time is important to me. I am a single mom, full time employee and part time graduate student. Setting aside time to spend with someone is a big deal because that means I have to get a sitter, rush to do homework, etc. And it is for these exact same reasons that I am just as considerate about the time of others. Since we were fairly early in our dating adventures a simple call would have been acceptable. The excuse used wouldn't have really mattered to me but definitely noted as a means of identifying patterns of behavior going forward. SN: I am a phone call type of girl. A text would have been ignored even though I sent one, mainly because I ALWAYS call first.
Dudes are always asking me why am I still single. They are usually quick to label me as picky or high maintenance but Jamaica is a perfect example of a dude doing something stupid which got him teliminated from my life. A phone call could have avoided this outcome. Isn't that the same thing our parents used to say?
So what lead to Jamaica's downfall? Well we were supposed to meet up for a date, one in which we had talked to each other about just an hour and a half prior to the scheduled meet time of 7:30pm. Well 7:30 came, no Jamaica. 8:00 came, no Jamaica, no phone call or text. 8:30 I called and left a voicemail. 8:45 I sent a text. 9pm he was unofficially released, barring extenuating circumstances such as death, arrest or hospitalization. However those circumstances had an expiration time of midnight. When I finally heard back from him, it around 1pm the next day and it was by text, which read, "I am so sorry. I was speelling." Ok, first of all what the hell is speelling? And secondly, was the best excuse he could come up with 18 hours later? Honestly he could have kept that message because I don't communicate after a cut but I do enjoy a good lie every now and then. He didn't even try to envoke his imagination...
Here is an important take away from Jamaica's slip. My time is important to me. I am a single mom, full time employee and part time graduate student. Setting aside time to spend with someone is a big deal because that means I have to get a sitter, rush to do homework, etc. And it is for these exact same reasons that I am just as considerate about the time of others. Since we were fairly early in our dating adventures a simple call would have been acceptable. The excuse used wouldn't have really mattered to me but definitely noted as a means of identifying patterns of behavior going forward. SN: I am a phone call type of girl. A text would have been ignored even though I sent one, mainly because I ALWAYS call first.
Dudes are always asking me why am I still single. They are usually quick to label me as picky or high maintenance but Jamaica is a perfect example of a dude doing something stupid which got him teliminated from my life. A phone call could have avoided this outcome. Isn't that the same thing our parents used to say?
Thursday, October 14, 2010
Something New....
So I went on my first blind date EVER last weekend, and to my surprise it wasn't a horror story. I actually had a good time, despite going into it I was thinking in the back of my mind that dude was crazy and was gonna stuff me in the trunk of his car, drive me to a remote location and bury me alive... Ok a bit much, I know...lol. But no for real!
Anywho we enjoyed a nice dinner at Vida Mexican Eatery y Cantina (code for expensive tacos but definitely worth the try) and played a few rounds of pool after dinner. Conversation was great! He is from Jamaica, so we will just call him Mr. Jamaica, and his accent made me melt. I've never dated anyone from the Caribbean, nothing against them just never dated them. He smelled so good and his kisses...... (No worries, I'm gonna keep it PG).
I definitely stepped out of my comfort zone on this one. Something that I realized that I needed to start doing because what I was doing previously just wasn't yielding the results I desired. I'm proud of myself. I've gotten rid of the list, because as my bestie recently told me "lists are for grocery shopping and chores." Don't get me wrong, there are still some "can't do withouts" (i.e. dude must have ALL of his teeth, must have his own ride and place to stay, no more than 2 children and 2 baby mommas, etc.) but at the end of the day my list made it seem like I was trying to date Jesus. And since Jesus isn't available it's time for me to start looking for someone who is.
So here is to something new... I'm sooooo EXCITED!
Anywho we enjoyed a nice dinner at Vida Mexican Eatery y Cantina (code for expensive tacos but definitely worth the try) and played a few rounds of pool after dinner. Conversation was great! He is from Jamaica, so we will just call him Mr. Jamaica, and his accent made me melt. I've never dated anyone from the Caribbean, nothing against them just never dated them. He smelled so good and his kisses...... (No worries, I'm gonna keep it PG).
I definitely stepped out of my comfort zone on this one. Something that I realized that I needed to start doing because what I was doing previously just wasn't yielding the results I desired. I'm proud of myself. I've gotten rid of the list, because as my bestie recently told me "lists are for grocery shopping and chores." Don't get me wrong, there are still some "can't do withouts" (i.e. dude must have ALL of his teeth, must have his own ride and place to stay, no more than 2 children and 2 baby mommas, etc.) but at the end of the day my list made it seem like I was trying to date Jesus. And since Jesus isn't available it's time for me to start looking for someone who is.
So here is to something new... I'm sooooo EXCITED!
Monday, August 2, 2010
Off with her hair!
About the only consistent thing about me is my propensity to change. On average I change addresses once a year, cars about every 2 years, and hairstyles every 3 - 6 months. So when I decided to shave all my hair off my head for the 3rd time in as many years, G.I. Jane style of course, I was confused as to why folks still took the time to gasp in shock. And about the dumbest question ever asked to man follows the gasp: "But what made you cut all your hair off?" I wish I was remotely witty in my response but I've determined that whenever I exploit that part of my personality people tend to label me crass.
Sidenote: I never understand how some folks have the nerve of to ask YOU a question regarding YOUR decision making and then get upset about YOUR response.
Anywho, back to the point.... So this time I think I want to attempt to loc my hair. I know, I know... this requires patience and some stability; qualities that I have yet to master. Besides, I just can't stay away from a good wig. The longer the better. I guess what I'm trying to say is, it's MY hair and I will do what I want with it. I'm very comfortable being Nefertari, so I don't need your advice on how to do me.
Sidenote: I never understand how some folks have the nerve of to ask YOU a question regarding YOUR decision making and then get upset about YOUR response.
Anywho, back to the point.... So this time I think I want to attempt to loc my hair. I know, I know... this requires patience and some stability; qualities that I have yet to master. Besides, I just can't stay away from a good wig. The longer the better. I guess what I'm trying to say is, it's MY hair and I will do what I want with it. I'm very comfortable being Nefertari, so I don't need your advice on how to do me.
Monday, July 19, 2010
Day 8 without cable tv... What the hell was I thinking?!?
Just in time for the coonery known as the TO and OchoCinco shows, I had decided to remove cable television from my life. I unplugged the box , drove to the mall and handed it over to the TWC rep. Just like that I quit the drug that left me with less brain cells each day. It was a sudden decision; something that I can probably blame on the Vodka Summit that I just so happened to attend on the evening before. Either way here I am, going through withdrawals.
Day 1 wasn't so bad, but afterall I barely spent more than 3 hours awake at home. But when the boy returned from his visit with the grandparents last weekend that is when the sweats and itching began. He went into his room and turned the tv on as normal but unbeknownst to him there would be no Yo Gabba Gabba waiting for him. He looked at the snowy receiption in amazement then proceeded to turn the channels almost as if it were a fluke of some sort. Once he realized that the same boring show was on all the channels he shrugged his shoulders, turned off the TV and proceeded to attempt the same process on the other 2 TVs in the house. On that day I was grateful for the "Let's meet the numbers" DVD. It seemed to capture his attention and he showed immediate interest in pointing out numbers to me everywhere he could find them.
However, fast forward to day 7 and I am no longer known as Mommy but as the jungle gym sitting on the couch. As I attempted to take an online assessment for class the boy determined that jumping and climbing on me was way more exciting than watching ANY DVD. I tried to fool him with outdoor activities (i.e. riding his bike, going to the pool, playing catch with the dog), and yet I was the one that ended up the fool. No sooner than returning in doors I became the designated playground. This eventually led to me putting the boy in bed at 8:30 with a Curious George DVD on repeat, and a stern warning that if his narrow behind got out of the bed for any reason other than to use the potty he and my belt would be getting acquainted.
Well to say that I felt guilty after that exchange would be the understatement of the year. I as we speak have decided to give in the television obsession by placing an order with DirecTv for service and purchasing a Wii. However, the fast will continue until August 1st. Does this mean that I am less of a sucker because I'm making him wait 2 weeks?
Day 1 wasn't so bad, but afterall I barely spent more than 3 hours awake at home. But when the boy returned from his visit with the grandparents last weekend that is when the sweats and itching began. He went into his room and turned the tv on as normal but unbeknownst to him there would be no Yo Gabba Gabba waiting for him. He looked at the snowy receiption in amazement then proceeded to turn the channels almost as if it were a fluke of some sort. Once he realized that the same boring show was on all the channels he shrugged his shoulders, turned off the TV and proceeded to attempt the same process on the other 2 TVs in the house. On that day I was grateful for the "Let's meet the numbers" DVD. It seemed to capture his attention and he showed immediate interest in pointing out numbers to me everywhere he could find them.
However, fast forward to day 7 and I am no longer known as Mommy but as the jungle gym sitting on the couch. As I attempted to take an online assessment for class the boy determined that jumping and climbing on me was way more exciting than watching ANY DVD. I tried to fool him with outdoor activities (i.e. riding his bike, going to the pool, playing catch with the dog), and yet I was the one that ended up the fool. No sooner than returning in doors I became the designated playground. This eventually led to me putting the boy in bed at 8:30 with a Curious George DVD on repeat, and a stern warning that if his narrow behind got out of the bed for any reason other than to use the potty he and my belt would be getting acquainted.
Well to say that I felt guilty after that exchange would be the understatement of the year. I as we speak have decided to give in the television obsession by placing an order with DirecTv for service and purchasing a Wii. However, the fast will continue until August 1st. Does this mean that I am less of a sucker because I'm making him wait 2 weeks?
Thursday, June 24, 2010
Did you just voicemail me?
After getting the phone number of a potential interest from a mutual friend I was faced with the do I text or call him dilemma. We had only met briefly at a networking event, so to be honest I wasn't sure if I had left a memorable impression. But there I was, with number in hand...
It felt like high school all over again. You remember, the days when we would get the number, sit in front of the phone, muster the courage to dial the number and cop out right before dialing the last digit? Or how about you would dial the full number and then hang up before someone answered or prayed that you would get the answering machine so you wouldn't have to leave a message? *Hey I'm old. This was before everybody had caller i.d. and answering machines were used to screen calls*
Well after consulting with a few sources I was relieved to find out about a service that would allow me to call this person and get put directly into his voicemail. Like wow... really? It's exactly what I needed in my life. #POW This service should be considered a national treasure. Why was I just finding out about it? And did everyone else but me know that there was an app for it? I am now an avid supporter of this service.
As stated in their advertisement: Many use their service because they are short on time, don't want to bother someone, want to avoid an awkward conversation or when a text message just won't cut it! Yep I'm all over removing awkwardness from my life. I don't need additional opportunities to make a complete ass of myself.
It felt like high school all over again. You remember, the days when we would get the number, sit in front of the phone, muster the courage to dial the number and cop out right before dialing the last digit? Or how about you would dial the full number and then hang up before someone answered or prayed that you would get the answering machine so you wouldn't have to leave a message? *Hey I'm old. This was before everybody had caller i.d. and answering machines were used to screen calls*
Well after consulting with a few sources I was relieved to find out about a service that would allow me to call this person and get put directly into his voicemail. Like wow... really? It's exactly what I needed in my life. #POW This service should be considered a national treasure. Why was I just finding out about it? And did everyone else but me know that there was an app for it? I am now an avid supporter of this service.
As stated in their advertisement: Many use their service because they are short on time, don't want to bother someone, want to avoid an awkward conversation or when a text message just won't cut it! Yep I'm all over removing awkwardness from my life. I don't need additional opportunities to make a complete ass of myself.
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Operation find Nef a why-te man....
Yea, I have to admit this latest campaign is drawing controversy. But then again when is anything about me not involving some controversy. Dating is like a box of chocolates... so many choices, dark, milk and yes my friends even white. And I am not ashamed to say I am equal opportunity when it comes to chocolate and men.
Why white men? Well.... why not? I ain't skerd and this ain't new territory for me. My ex-husband was white. Yes, I did say ex and I know what you are thinking... "if it didn't work out with him why go back?" Well it didn't work out with any of the black guys that I've dated and that hasn't deterred my pursuit of them. The way I see it, as with anything else in life, dating is a numbers game. The more available candidates in the pool to select from the more likely I will end up in a relationship. Besides some of y'all of over thinking this operation. It's dating and I'm having fun and at the end of the day that is all I care about (for now at least). And for those of you who know me personally know that if nothing else occurs during this process we are at least guaranteed to have some good laughs...
Welp, I hope you enjoy the journey and the live tweets...lol. Names will be changed to protect the innocent, namely me.
www.twitter.com/justnef
Why white men? Well.... why not? I ain't skerd and this ain't new territory for me. My ex-husband was white. Yes, I did say ex and I know what you are thinking... "if it didn't work out with him why go back?" Well it didn't work out with any of the black guys that I've dated and that hasn't deterred my pursuit of them. The way I see it, as with anything else in life, dating is a numbers game. The more available candidates in the pool to select from the more likely I will end up in a relationship. Besides some of y'all of over thinking this operation. It's dating and I'm having fun and at the end of the day that is all I care about (for now at least). And for those of you who know me personally know that if nothing else occurs during this process we are at least guaranteed to have some good laughs...
Welp, I hope you enjoy the journey and the live tweets...lol. Names will be changed to protect the innocent, namely me.
www.twitter.com/justnef
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